everything's computer

plus shock market updates, woolly mice, and petty trolling

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TL;DR

  • When you’re feeling overwhelmed just remember this: Everything’s computer.

  • Did you know? Hiring managers have egos!

  • The CEO of Bluesky does some next level t-shirt trolling at SXSW.

Some sayings are so good that they become instant classics. Let us introduce you to this one:

President Trump hopped into the driver’s seat of a Tesla (and maybe a car?) for the first time ever this week and dropped a statement that is simultaneously hilarious and also so so true when he excitedly exclaimed “Wow…everything’s computer!”

And you know what? We agree.

Everything is computer.

💥 Shock Market Updates 💥

After a week/month/not-quite-quarter-year full of surprises, we’re doing something a little different today: Shock Market Updates – a.k.a. surprising, weird, tech and business news shaping headlines.*

Let’s get into it!

🔻Founder fundraising

Venture capital firms are noticing a “vibe shift” with the newest cohort of Y Combinator startup founders: they’re less likely to seek funding and more likely to stay lean so they can maintain a larger ownership stake in their companies.

🔻Tesla’s popularity

Tesla shares plunged by 15% earlier this week, experiencing its most severe drop since 2020. This might surprise some folks since Tesla shares hit a high ($479.86) in December 2024. But for those paying close attention to Tesla, you’ve probably noticed steady losses for the past 7 weeks straight.

🔺Free Tesla advertising

It might be a bad time to be a Tesla shareholder and Tesla vehicle owner, but at least they got a free White House lawn infomercial out of it! (See: title of this edition)

🔺Elbows

In the ongoing will-they-or-won’t-they start an all out trade war between the US and…everyone, Canada has come out swinging with their response to the tariffs: “Elbows up” 🏒

🔻Grocery prices

Consumers got some relief from inflation last month, with the cost of groceries (other than eggs, of course) holding relatively steady. 

🔻Meta’s chill factor

Mark Zuckerberg and Meta are being decidedly unchill by attempting to block a tell-all book by a former director of global public policy. The ruling stated that the author, Wynn-Williams, needs to halt promotion of the book—but the ruling didn’t say anything about the publisher.

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Let’s dish 🤭

babe wake up, new small talk just dropped

Mundus sine Caesaribus

sold out in 30 minutes!!

As a board-certified hater, respect where respect is due. Bluesky’s CEO, Jay Graber, trolled Mark Zuckerberg on stage at SXSW without saying a thing about him or Meta.

Graber wore a shirt parodying the t-shirt that made waves last year when Zuck wore it on stage for a Meta Connect keynote. Zuckerberg’s shirt said Aut Zuck aut nihil — meaning “either Zuck or nothing” — in reference to the Roman dictator’s statement: aut Caesar aut nihil.

In assumed response, Graber’s shirt at SXSW said Mundus sine Caesaribus “a world without Caesars.”

The shirts were so popular with users that they decided to sell them on the site for $40 each, and sold out in half an hour.

That’s masterclass level petty trolling, and we love to see it.

🫖 What's the tea?

  • Scientists want to revive the woolly mammoth, and they made a woolly mouse in the process! Gosh, this thing is cute.

  • Popular tech layoff tracker, Layoffs.fyi, now tracks government employee layoffs by DOGE. The current total is 35,983.

  • Watch this woman and her cat reunite after two months of missing her pet due to the LA wildfires. 🥹

See you next week! 👋

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